A Small Hurt
D and I chose not have biological children for medical and personal reasons and have grown our family through adoption instead. I'll admit it, there have been times when I've wondered if we made the right choice, closing that door so finally (and believe me, it's not only closed, it's locked with the key thrown away), but until last weekend, the cost of that decision never really hurt. A friend and I were talking after finishing a race we'd both competed in, and she said, "it was like giving birth, you know?" All I could think was, "No, I don't know." I was speechless, smacked upside the head by the thought, so I just nodded. Part of me was happy that my friend forgot that my kids were adopted- the fact that I was a mom meant that I should know what it's like to give birth, right? But a small part of my heart felt very, very sad for a little while after that.
Infertility hurts and that pain doesn't disappear because we become mommies. I think of it as mourning for the unborn/unconceived child. Just like with mourning, some days are great and others are tough. Hang in there and know that you're not alone.ReplyDelete