Feeling a Little Homesick

August 28, 2019

   Right now, the electricity is on rolling brown outs on Ebeye and it's affecting me a lot more than I thought it would.
 I never know when I'll have electricity at my apartment and that means that I constantly have to be prepared to not have power.  I never know if I'll be able to cook dinner for Earth  and I so I have to have food that doesn't need cooking on hand.  I never know if we'll be able to charge our devices so I have to plan ahead and bring our devices and chargers into work with me.  I never know if we'll have AC at night so I have to be prepared to fan Earth while he falls asleep because the apartment turns into a sauna when there's no AC and no breeze.
  I know we are living in the lap of luxury, relatively.  We have AC when we have power, we have beds, doors that lock, and a secure food source, things that are inaccessible to others on this island.  I know how lucky we are to have all this. But knowing all that doesn't make it easier to sleep when power is out and the voices of the dozens of kids in the street manage to come through the window but a breeze doesn't.
  We don't feel at home here and all those voices coming into the apartment, in a language I don't understand, while we lay there and sweat feels like a constant reminder of everything that this mistake cost us.

3 comments

  1. Can you explain what went wrong that would require you to have to go back to fix? This seems excessive for a child that you have had the whole time.

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  2. Hi Amber, I know you are strong and will get through this! Hugs from PA.

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  3. Your strength and endurance and love for your family are amazing and inspirational. It's great to keep perspective but also okay to just note at times that it sucks! Stay strong and know you have random people like me praying for you and supporting you from afar!

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