Thinking Outside the Box

November 28, 2012

  Sky has really been trying to exert her independence lately, mostly by saying, "No" and refusing to do things that we ask her to, or by ignoring us entirely.  One of the ways this has manifested itself has been her refusing to get ready in the morning.  She'll go to the bathroom but instead of getting changed, she'll throw herself on the floor and lay there.  Or she'll refuse to pick out clothes or brush her teeth.  But I found a way around it the other morning: I told her that I didn't think that she could get ready fast than Daddy.  Sky loves a challenge.  I got excited and started telling D that Sky was going to be at the breakfast table before him, and Sky hopped out of bed and hurried to the bathroom.  I still had to encourage her along and she still balked at brushing her teeth but she got ready for the first time in a while without a fuss and without foot dragging.  I don't know that the trick will work everyday but it sure made for a nice morning when it did work.
  I had another good idea last night when Sky didn't want to stay in bed after bedtime.  After taking her back to her bed twice it finally occurred to me to ask if anything was bothering her, and she said, in her tiny, adorable voice, "Monsters.".  I told her that the monsters are afraid of Mommy and said, "Do you know what I do when I see monsters?  I tell them to go home to their mommies and go to bed."  I told her that it's past their bedtime too and then we practiced saying "Monster, go home to bed!" before I told her goodnight one last time.  I wasn't sure it would work but it must have calmed her down enough to allow her to go to sleep because we didn't hear another peep out of her. 
  I have a hard time remembering to think outside the box with Sky.  Most of the time I just want her to listen and do as I say and she has such an independent personality that she just goes her own way.  When I don't take the time to work with it, we get tears and stalling, but if I can make the time to think through the situation and get to the cause of it, sometimes I can find a solution that makes us both happy.
  What's worked with your independent kids?

3 comments

  1. Box? What box? There's a box!!?? I think Rachel ate our box early on (or smashed it in a kung-fu-like frenzy), and we've been entirely without one since. The boxless life is the best life, if you ask me. Keep up the good work.

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    1. I like boxes! My mom actually laughes when I tell her about Ciela and her willfullness; she says that I was exactly the same way. God has such a sense of humor, giving me a daughter just like myself to make me work harder as a person to be a better parent.
      But I still like boxes!

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